I’m scared. More than I ever have been.
There’s the normal fear for my age group of the future.
I’m afraid I made a mistake 6 months ago.
I’m afraid we won’t be okay.
I’m afraid I won’t find a job.
I’m afraid of living at home again.
I’m afraid of school.
I’m afraid of messing things up.
I’m afraid I will never stop blaming someone for someone else’s mistakes…or my own.
I’m afraid.
Fear use to inspire me. I used to use it to fight…to fight through insecurities, worry, and doubt. Now? It uses me.
I know this is a contradictory post to the theme of this blog, but I’m writing to let other people having these same fears know, you aren’t alone. And hoping to find my way through the fear.
<3
"He who has hope has everything." -Arabic Proverb
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I fight this every day of my life too. I realized a few years ago that living in fear isn’t living at all… it’s just damage control. I also realized that, to defeat it, I needed to have just a little faith in myself, my friends, and my higher power.
You’re right. You’re not alone. And I for one am rooting for you to make it.
Indy